SPIRITUALITY - 2

Compassionate Conversation.

Tricia Graham. November 2009

Where is God in our every day encounters? How do we recognise God?

I work in Hospital Chaplaincy and my favourite definition of Pastoral Care comes from Graham Griffin and goes something like this: “Pastoral Care happens when two (or more) people sit together in the presence of God and the humanity of both is enhanced.”

I intended to visit a gentleman in Orthopaedics one afternoon. I understood him to be a UCA member. When I visited, his wife was with him. There seemed to be unease in the room, which I didn’t understand. He didn’t really speak to me and his wife eventually said that it wasn’t an appropriate time to visit and could I come back, which I agreed to do. I returned some time later and when I entered the room the nurse was helping out of the bed and when he saw me he frantically waved his arms at me shouting : “No, No, No…” I took it that it was still an inappropriate time to call and beat a hasty retreat!!!

I found myself in a dilemma. I didn’t return that afternoon, nor the next day. In fact I didn’t summon the courage to visit until the next week after he had gone to rehabilitation. How would he feel about seeing me? Would it be embarrassing for him? Would I be best to just leave it? But no, that didn’t feel to be right. So I took my trepidation and put it down outside his door…

He smiled a welcome. He spoke slowly, hesitatingly. I realised almost immediately that his health problems involved more than orthopaedic surgery. We laughed together about my aborted attempts to visit him earlier. He slowly told me his story. He had had a stroke two years previously. It had left him very debilitated physically and with severely impaired speech. He had recovered much of his mobility and was gradually recovering his speech which was halting and delivered with great deliberation. His speech was clear but he struggled with expression. Enormous work and patience would have gone into the improvements he’d made. His losses had been considerable – a fit educated man in his 70’s coming to terms with a situation which was potentially very limiting. His calm acceptance spoke of peace; his quiet humour was uplifting; his gentle patience and fortitude inspiring. My agony of indecision about whether or not to visit was completely unfounded.

It was tiring for him to speak for long periods which I owned with him. I was so grateful for our conversation and thanked him for sharing his story. As I made my departure we shared our gratitude for the encounter, both of us smiling, both buoyed up with the sharing of human experience. I felt I had received a gift and left the room walking on air.

God hadn’t been mentioned … and yet the Spirit presence - connection, compassion, love(deep respect and honour) was there between us, each for the other. As I reflected on it, I thought about the kingdom of God and the search, the waiting for it; when will it come that is spoken of in the Gospels. And I recalled Jesus’ response in Luke 17.21: “You cannot say, “Look, here it is,” or “There it is!” For the kingdom of God is among you!” Indeed the kingdom of God is there when we sit together in loving exchange of shared human story and then go our separate ways uplifted, enhanced by the encounter.

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Ian's contact details:

Phone No: 03 9589 4496
Email: minister@beaumarisblackrockunitingchurch.org.au

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